Happy Mother's Day

I've always thought that Mother's Day was a silly holiday, invented by Hallmark to sell sappy cards and  to guilt otherwise wayward children into being nice to their poor moms for at least one day out of the year.  Not that I don't love and honor the mothers in my life, especially my own...but if you're reading this, you probably know me well enough to know how I feel about sappy.  Yuck. 

But, today, I feel a new sense of satisfaction, of contentment, of belonging.  This year, I've joined the club.  Its initation rites are long and arduous:  they start with morning nausea, fatigue and swollen ankles, and culminate with one magnificently joyous (and painful) day.  New membership is no walk in the park either -- it's a seemingly endless stretch of late night pacing, early morning feedings, and baptism by smelly substances.  To join, one must renounce (or signficantly curtail) all other memberships.  But, I wear my membership badges -- wet kisses on my shoulder and drool stains on my front -- with tremendous pride.  Messy as they are, they mark that this year, I am a mother. 

Dear Ford,

Today is our first real Mother's Day together.  (Last year, you gave me a massage for Mother's Day, but as your fingers and toes had not yet lost their webs, and you had not yet opened your eyes in my tummy, I'm not sure how much you actually had to do with it.)   This year, you gave me a beautiful bouquet of flowers, a sweet card, and (perhaps best of all), you slept through the night.  Thank you.

Last night, as I rocked you to sleep, I cried as I held you.  I still cannot believe you are our sweet son and that I am your mother.  I love to stare at your wild and crazy curls, your almost too-long eyelashes, and your sweet baby skin as you fall asleep.  You are so beautiful, but you are such a boy too.  You play hard and laugh loud and make funny noises all day long.  Every day, you find new ways to delight us.  We love you so much.

I know that future Mother's Days will bring sweet homemade cards and handpicked flowers and other fun prizes from you, and how wonderful that will be.  But today, our first Mother's Day together, it is my great joy to hold and cuddle and kiss your sweet baby self.  I love you so much, my son.

Love,
Mama